In this series, we present, each month, a prayer kirtan composed by His Holiness Maharanyam Sri Sri Muralidhara Swamiji. These kirtans underline the importance of prayers and show us how to pray.
O Krishna, Even if my Love for you is only Pretense, Please make it True
Meera sings –
“Aswan jal sInchi sInchi, prem beli boi”.
(With the tears in my eyes, I watered the creeper of love [for God])
This is the state of the countless Mahans who descended on this earth from time to time. They yearned and cried for the Lord all their lives. The countless compositions that flowed out when they were immersed in blissful ocean of bhakti bhavas are a testimony to this fact. And if we keep listening to them continuously, these divine compositions have the power to inspire devotion in our hearts too.
Now one may ask, is this really possible? In the path of Bhakti, one relies purely on the Lord’s grace and not on his or her own capabilities. Sri Ramakrishna Paramahamsa, the great Mahan from Kolkata, often compared this to crossing the river in a big ship. The Lord is akin to the big ship. One has to somehow get aboard the ship. Once aboard, the traveler can rest assured that he will reach the destination. Similarly, one has to somehow just start walking on the path of Bhakti. It does not matter even if the devotion is at first just mechanical and not true devotion from the heart. The Lord takes care of transforming that into pure love.
In the composition, “Un mIdu uLLa Asai”, Sri Swamiji beseeches the Lord to transform his ’false’ and superficial devotion into pure love for the Lord! The song is set in Ahiri raga – a raga typically used for pleading and lamenting. The lyrics and the meaning are as follows.
un mIdu uLLa Asai poiyE AnAlum – adai
meiyana seidiDuvai kaNNA
kuttramuLLa mAnudan nAnE AvEn
pattruLLa mAnudan nAnE AvEn
Attralilla mAnudan nAnE AvEn
kAttru pol alaiyidhu en manam dAnE
paritavikkum ennidam paritApam illayO
arivili ennidam anuthApam illayO
sarukki vizhum ennai sattre pArAi
arudiyittu solven adaikalam nInE
Even if my fondness for you is only false (shallow and superficial)
Oh Kanna! Transform it into true and pure love
I am one who has innumerable faults,
I am also one who has is bound by many attachments.
I am one who lacks competence
My mind too wavers here and there, like the wind
Won’t you have pity on me, who is struggling with anguish?
Won’t you have some sympathy for this dim-witted being?
I am stumbling and falling; please turn your glance toward me once
Unquestionably, you are my sole refuge!
Sowmya Balasubramanian San Jose, CA